I’m hoping this doesn’t just sound like one big rant and hopefully someone out there can sympathize with me…please…anyone…let me explain.
When I wake up in the morning my first thought is always the same, I have xx amount of minutes to have a shower and then Olivia will be up. Once I jump in the shower it is usually just a few minutes until her little face is pressed up against the glass “Mummy, Mummy did I have a big sleep?” ” Yes Olivia now hurry up and go to the toilet so we can get ready for school.”
After lots of meaning less chat whilst she in the bathroom it starts again “Hurry up Olivia we have to get your uniform on” whilst still moving at a snails pace…”Hurry up Olivia and flush the toilet please” and I wait..and wait…”Hurry up Olivia and wash those hands please, we need to get dressed” Finally she decided that after washing her hands twice that they are clean.
“Hurry up Olivia and get your pyjamas off please” She needs help.She can do but can she be bothered?…who knows..its just quicker for me to tug the top over her head. “Get the bottoms off please, I’ve got your uniform here, we need to speed up” Whilst she jumps on the bed and sings George Ezra we finally get the pj’s off and the socks on. “Hurry up Olivia and get your shirt on please it’s too cold to be dancing around” and then “Hurry up please come on get that shirt buttoned up we are nearly there good girl”. She can only do the bottom two buttons so I do the top two. “Mummy I can’t get these buttons done” “well you did them yesterday Olivia come on and try hard, I bet you can do it” after a few failed attempts I do because once again its just quicker.
“Hurry up Olivia please get your teeth brushed”. After admiring herself in the mirror she finally completes this task and then its back to “Hurry up Olivia let’s get downstairs and get your shoes on please” This she does quite quickly which is a miracle in itself at times!
I sometimes branch out and change it up a bit. “Come on Olivia get your bowl and spoon out for breakfast” I pour the cereal out. “Come on Olivia sit up properly and eat up we have to go in 15 Minutes” This is usually when she decides to tell me what she has been up to in school. The information I actually want and crave for but right when I need her to be moving swiftly along, how typical! “That’s great Olivia but how about you tell me that after you eat up that cereal, Hurry Up please Zanna is on her way and she will eat that up on you”. After glancing at the clock I realise we have 10 minutes. “Olivia we have to go in 10 minutes, you only have a few corn flakes left, come on now” At this point i’m usually running around the kitchen like a lunatic trying to pack school bags, get lunches organised and wash dishes. “Hurry up Olivia I need to wash that bowl please, eat up” Finally she is done! “Olivia put your coat on please”. “Olivia, I said please put your coat on” “Olivia this is the last time I’m asking you please put your coat on” It’s finally on. I even zip it up just to speed up the process.
We walk out to the car and she holds my hand. I put her in the car to go to her childminders house with minutes to spare until I need to leave for work and I kiss her wee warm cheek and say “see you later alligator” and she always replies “in a while crocodile” with the biggest smile and she always tells me she loves me. I wish she hadn’t “hurried up” I wish we could have another 15 minutes together. I wish I had sang along to George Ezra in the bedroom. I wish I had brushed her hair slowly and didn’t pull at it to do it quickly. I wish I had asked more questions about school and sat with her until she finished her cereal.
Why didn’t I just slow down and enjoy that time together instead of the rush? The mum guilt strikes at 8.05am…daily.